My liver just broke up with me...
and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
hot girl, 5 o clock
do you know how to read a clock?
I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The Firefighter Games are going to be in Tampa the same weekend I am. I think God is answering my vagina's prayers.
Stole every fake plant from the lobby and placed it in front of you're apartment door, Enjoy!
You demanded I give you a glass of water, so I set it down in front of you and you knock it over and roll in it..,
I wanted to be a dolphin.
I mean we had sex in a crib. You tell me how my night was.
Tomorrow's thirsty thursday is now sponsored by the three time champion, chemisty failure. celebration starts asap.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We could all 3 jump out of a cake in just tophats. A true marble cake.
u kept repeating to itself "hot cheetos and nacho cheese sauce.."
Is using cherry lube as jam shameful or hilarious
Nothing says I'm committed to you for all eternity like letting him wear crocs to the wedding
Ok maybe second best. He dated a stripper. Can't compete with that level of hoeness
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
Randomize