so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
I woke up on the steps beside a plate of spaghetti and a toilet paper roll ripped in half. And i actually think this day is gonna get better.
I was taking a bath while he walked in, sat down on the toilet, and said "its like a baby, I can see it crowning."
she genuinely believed that kangaroos are a cross between a deer and a T-rex
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Blood work from physical was all good, apparently heavy alcohol use agrees with me
some kid lit a j in the bar tonight. i was in awe of both his boldness and the severe beatdown he received moments later
Do you know how many guys' fantasies I've been told I'm a part of lately?!
Just 2. But still.
...and that's why girls with IBS don't paint their nails
I've officially dedicated my newly single life to making myself squirt.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All im saying is that my face might fall off.
You threw up at the outdoor bar and it was pretty...astonishing just how much can come out of such a small human.
Instead of going to my moms birthday party I went over and gave him head. I should win non girlfriend of the year award
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
I was so drunk I asked my mom if she had always been my mom or if it was someone else for a while
Or is it distressingly heterosexual?
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