I think i just got paid for sex with a hot pocket... and i accepted
Quiet hours sex sucks. I hate finals.
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His parents had a bottle of captain morgan on the table for me when I went for dinner. I feel accepted
I swear if she asks me for a baby one more time I'm gonna sleep with one of her friends
He texted back and said he would hook up if he didn't have a test at 8am. It's really hard to be annoyed by how good of a student he is.
Yeah that sucks. That's why I stick to deadbeat sports management majors.
I'm worried my skin won't stretch enough to handle this boner. Then what?
First time at a gay bar. I found a surrogate AND sperm donor! The surrogate is straight, so it evens out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
is that a sigh of girlish delight, or "sigh...I'm having a herpes outbreak'
Can't it be both?
You made me take a photo of you under the stairs at the bar. "Look I'm Harry Potter."
You kept insisting you found queso that's better than oral sex
I just tried to get a motorcycle cop to give me a ride....he told me not to ask strangers for rides
I never said it was inaccurate, I said I hate you.
She was shaving her legs in the neighbors pool when we found her.
Where'd she get the razor?
Not the point.
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