What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
I just saw the dad from "Little People Big World" at the airport. I chased him down and congratulated him for beating the DUI.
stumble upon led me to how to make wine in prison, followed by wedding dresses. it knows my life too well
Coming home soaking wet at three am and trying to convince the front desk man that we came from the library might have worked if I wasn't also roaring at everything.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He pocket texted me while I was blowing him in the car...What are the odds?
Considering how often you blow him,high.
Is it too early to say this year has been a blur?
Nothing quite like coming out of an alcohol induced blackout walking down Spruill Avenue carrying a silver briefcase full of IT tools you don't know where they came from. This is my life.
You said that when your ex gave you a blowjob her mouth was like velvet
To give you an idea, there's a group upstairs trying to break down a door with their fists and heads.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
"She's seriously grinding on him while whispering into his ear, 'take me to McDonald's.'"
My frontal lobe is being piloted by Jack Daniels right now.
Also this just in, I think you could see my sequins underwear that say unwrap me through my leggings all day while I hung out with his family
Look, road flare archery was agreed on. We both accepted it was a shit idea sober, but did it drunk anyway.
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
Throwing up in a storm drain... Not my finest moment.
But my shoes looked boss
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