I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
Things found in my vomit last night: cell phone, Von Hayes rookie card, a boot, my dignity
My leg won't stop wagging. It's like it's congratulating my vagina.
I want to hold her baby but I'm afraid I'll give it a contact buzz
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I apologize for excluding you. On a better note: the stripper that made out with my wife friend requested me on facebook
then you said,"Take this damn cabbage!" although it was actually your shirt. i found you in the elevator of his building.
Casually brushing the Bacardi out of my hair. It's a good time to ponder regretting everything that happened last night.
At the ER, will you come pick me up... Had an allergic reaction, wanted to see if I could eat a peanut without dying... Do you how bad this is evolutionary, I would have died back in the days of survival of the fitest by now
someday i'll meet a woman who will love me for my marvelous breasts and ignore my many character faults.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hate ovaries. They're horrible little sacs of satanic enmity.
That's the most poetic description of female anatomy I've ever heard.
we all thought you were asleep. he found you an hour later sitting outside in the snow lighting a bowl, singing the CatDog theme song, and hugging a box a Franzia.
I found my soulmate. Behold my idiot as we spaz into the sunset.
Lemme put it this way babe, at point you were naked in Target.
Where were you?
Laughing
Yeah. I found my shirt from last night while walking back to the bar to get my purse/phone this morning. I'm never going to even ask what actually happened. Be glad you moved 7 states away.
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
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