You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
i dont know if you remember blowing your vomity nose directly into my hand...yeah thanks for that
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
Dude, it's the frankincense and myrrh soap. Smelling like baby Jesus will get you laid.
After we had sex he made me watch a Top Gun highlight video...
I FINALLY GET TO MASTURBATE. SO EXCITED.
Today is my 3 year wedding anniversary...and I've seen three different dicks.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
it was one of those unspoken contracts of silence like "I teach your daughter and you work at a strip club"...I don't tell if you don't
Three of my exes and one of my exes' brothers have hit me up and it's only been a week. I hate semester break.
It's okay I didn't send any nudes tonight so we are safe *inserts photo of a baseball umpire doing the safe signal*
I couldn't break up with him while I was wearing a Hakuna Matata shirt.
When breakfast is a rum &coke at the office Christmas party you know it's gonna be a good day
I just discovered that jello shots are the best hangover cure
You said that last night when you did jello shots at 4am
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