What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
There are dudes in kilts outside my window practicing fire breathing with cheap vodka and a modified grill lighter. I thought you should know.
We have a tower of vodka coming. OF VODKA
i ran into my coworkers when i was walking home last night. i was shirtless. i think i gave my shirt to Walter. he's a cat.
im still drunk. birthday week begins.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
When that wave blew your top off I heard someone yell "SPANK BANK"
As a former fat girl, that's probably the best compliment I've ever received ever!
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
you threw me on the ground pryed my purse out of my hands screaming " I JUST WANNA HOLD IT A LITTLE BIT". later i found you putting on my lip gloss.
I know but at least you've never been asked to have sex dressed up like Catwoman
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't tell him that you hope he dies in a boring missionary position with his wife. That doesn't go over well.
the last i saw he was butt naked on the top deck of the bus trying to conduct a drunken choir so i really have no idea
sometimes you just gotta rip off the nipple tape and get it done.
This guy wants me to put ice under his foreskin. What!?
I think I'm more excited for Santa to come now that I made a drinking game out of it
In the past year, I've fucked 3 Dave's and you've fucked 2 Dave's. That's a lot of Dave's in our vaginas.
We need to start a soap opera called the Dave's of Our Lives.
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