just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
After 10 years all I have gotten is one bra pic, at this point I should be able to draw your cervix from memory
I only broke up with her because the ex sex is amazing. She will do ANYTHING if i even hint at getting back together
So I just chugged the rest of the wine in my mug so I would have something to eat my corn flakes in. With a plastic fork. I need a dishwasher
And maybe a life coach?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No one ever gets any after sleeping with her. She is like the broken mirror of hookups, enjoy 7 years of blue ball. Don't say I didn't warn you
Do they mail horrible human being awards or do I have to pick it up or what's the protocol on that shit
Watching boy meets world, drinking left over pink panty droppers and coloring in a my little pony coloring book. This is my Monday night
she dared me to make out with the amish dude so I went up to him and grabbed him by the beard
GRABBED HIM BY THE BEARD
Dude, he wouldn't have sex with me during halftime cause we were rooting for different teams and that would be "bad juju", I had to settle for 69.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have a knack for carnage and poetic language.
If my emotions are below a 3 or above a 7, I'm crying
I'm trying to fuck him and feed him. I don't understand why it isn't working.
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
We stood outside the room listening to them have sex and making meow noises
That's not right, is it?
Why were there just 3 inflatable bounce houses delivered to my house?
oh shit.
Randomize