It feels like he gave my taint an indian burn.
CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
Is it just me or do I always seem to have cum in my bellybutton?
Yep. About to get on pornhub to spill some Christmas cheer
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
great! i almost saw a gas station fight, and i believe i became the first person to successfully pee and puke in a bathtub simultaneously
Fell in the ditch running from the pizza guy I stole the pizza from. If you are still at my house come find me, pretty sure I need stitches.
Lemme guess, I was the one completely shit faced making out with the 50 year old...
LOL, wrong number bro. Good luck trying to figure out what happened though..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I tried to sit on a barstool last night...it was an open trashcan.
Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes.
I was only out of town for 1 week. His cell records show he texted 63 ex-gfs and hookups while I was gone. And 10 condoms are missing.
My hair is crimped, I am walking with a roadie, and my vibrator is in my purse. I feel sorry for tomorrow.
WEED IS MY SPIRIT ANIMAL
That one probably shouldn't have been in caps
I was the oldest, shortest, and soberest at the New Years party last night. My life sucks
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