when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
eating mexican with the mother in law. this meal made her decide to tell us about her colon cleansing diet
theyre just this beautiful family of functioning alcoholics. i want them to adopt me.
I think I'm going to try and hook up with that blond tonight.
I'm going for alcohol poisoning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just met his wife...she told me they have been having marriage problems and are spending his paychecks on marriage counseling...then she cried on my shoulder...NOW i feel like a bitch.
just got carried INTO the bar by 4 people. it's like watching my weekend in reverse.
No. No, there is no forgiveness for this. The only way I'm forgiving you for this is if you somehow convince your sister to have sex with me. In her car.
i think i made a good impression on his friends wen i survived 55 cup beer pong
at least if we puke, we will be surrounded by beautiful, non-judgemental trees.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You need 4-7 business day to recover from a fingering like that.
One of us will probably end up wearing nothing but glow/ neon body paint and a pair of water wings...
And I am in no way ashamed to say that it will most likely be me. I'm hoping for it actually.
Either I'm too drunk or she gave me a hand job to the rhythm of jingle bells.
I feel like I was dropped out of a helicopter. Through the propeller.
Idk if my headache is from the alcohol, the pot brownies, or being dragged down 8 flights of stairs by my ankles because i passed out in the 12th floor girls bathroom by you. Probably a combo of all three.
I’ve gotta be honest, I didn’t expect to have sex. I didn’t shave... anything. You couldn’t have been impressed.
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