i find it unbelievable that you didn't think it was necessary to intervene when i started letting people autograph my body with spray tan.
I went to pick my brother up downtown and I stopped at a red light a homeless old man comes up knocks on the window shows me his penis and then screams money
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
Send help, water and tortillas.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well after the shots I danced with a homeless guy, split my toe on broken glass, and had a 20 piece mcnugget. Who says postgrad life is boring.
All's fair in love and war. and tinder.
Fuck me this girl I went home with has a cover on her remote control so there is no spills to ruin it. Imagine how many condoms she's going to make me wear
she and her cat are both sick as fuck so they just sat there looking at each other with her nose dripping on the cat's. both out of fucks
I know. It was just so disappointing. I almost made it. And now the "when's the last time you peed your pants" clock has restarted. Lol
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm cooling my balls with a beer because I'm too cheap to turn on the AC
I puked in the back of my mom's new car because I had too much to drink at Chilis. I think I just hit rock bottom.
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. She asked how my day was going and it got hard.
he's so hot I'd consider breaking the whole, "till death do us part," agreement he's currently in
Are you drinking tequila at 1pm? ...at Disneyland?
I asked you why you bought a sword and you then replied with the greek alphabet and then tried to assure me that samurais are apart of greek life.
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