Buying beer for freshmen. No matter what they ask for, I'm getting them Colt 45.
Dude, I think my check liver light just came on
i just funneled a beer through a mask n snorkel.. can you check that off my bucket list..
I didnt shave my beard last night, so I could feel it while Im shrooming today
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
Wierdest expirience of my life this girl literally just knocked on my door at 140am to blow me in the shower. Idk what im doing but im doing it right
She just fell in the river. Meet us downstream with the bottle.
I think if it were a part of everyone's daily routine, the world would be happier. International Finger Yourself While Bathing Day.
Still want to know how you got back last night? Two Campus Security Officers carried you in around 430. Your pants were around your ankles.
I hate Sailor Jerry.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Every time I stand up, gravity punches me in the tits. This is horrible.
Seriously, I look like I crawled out of a bog. Succeeding at being as undateable as possible.
I'm turning into an adult here.
Adults touch each other's special zones.
Imagine how different my life would be if I could find a man who gave me more pleasure than pizza at 2am when I'm drunk.
On another note, I kinda only wanna poop laying down now
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
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