So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
After you puked you called ur mom and told her you fucked on her bed, then u said "Have a good night mommy!" hung up and passed out on my couch
that would explain 17missed calls and 3 very angry voicemails from her
I am full of burrito and curiosity
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You tired to make Beefaroni in the Mr. Coffee machine.
I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
hooking up with my manager sounds like an even better idea while i'm sober.
Its not christmas eve unless I give him head. I wont take no for an answer
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wish men found my impeccable aim when spitting into the sink attractive.
His idea of role playing was him wearing the halloween mitt romney mask while I gave him head
I fell asleep while studying last night and woke up smelling like whiskey and sex... words can not describe how confused I am
The sad part is that if I don't get a random pic of your balls or ass or both every month, I start to worry that we're not friends anymore
He was on my bed looking at me like a sacrifice to the gods of gay sex and he's definitely a bottom. Like Jesus Christ a really, really great ass of a bottom.
You can't just snapchat me a picture of a pregnancy test and then not answer your phone
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