We just saw a waitress walk by with a tray of bacardi and whipped cream.
Whoever ordered that deserves a pat on the back and the "classiest customer" award
she then came into the room and yelled I'M GOING TO BE A COCK BLOCK for 5 minutes
when I woke up she was standing in the living room with a bottle of scotch because she is "allergic to hangovers"
I asked her if she was the outdoorsy type, she replied "I had sex on a fourwheeler once, does that count?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thank God I did Vegas bombs with those cops at their Christmas party. We should so be in jail.
Me and Phil are just drawing pictures of thumbs in different costumes during lecture. I love being a senior.
the game I always play with drunk me is can-you-button-and-unbutton things? If the answer is no, go home. Usually it's his pants
Currently doing my walk of shame down a floating dock. No more guys who live on a boat EVER AGAIN
It's ok. I will share any beautiful men that I drug and leave unconscious on my bed. I'm that kind of friend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What's the standard Christmas present for six months of booty calls?
Mobile recharge?
A blind man just put his face in my cleavage. I'm also crying.
I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?
The cop looked me right in the eye and apologized for cock blocking me.
So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...
we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.
Randomize