Get out...Run...Or there's going to be a dick in your mailbox
I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
so,apparently a side effect from having sex on the beach is now i have a tanline shaped like your sister
i hate you
Asking him not to sleep with other girls is like asking me not to have my period apparently
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
remember our old mantra: why can't life be as easy as we are?
we can't get the sharpie off the toilet seat from where you pressed your forearm with THUG LIFE written on it while you puked until 3 last night
His balls looked like two miss shaped chicken nuggets
Just rinsed and put my styrofoam cup of noodles in the dishwasher. I need to be not hungover ASAP
Woke up with two different flip flops on sum burnt at the beach. Who are these French kids plz come back
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thank you <3 he just looked at me, fist bumped me, and asked me what was on my titty....we may cut her off
I need an IV, a new head, and stronger morals.
Never go with a hippy to a second location. I fucking hate Xanax.
If there is a heaven, that's what it will be. Bagel Bites and cunnilingus.
Do you remember last night?
Just that I fell down a hill with my penis out and the emt talked to me.
I brought coffee but not enough for the naked guy on your porch
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