i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
Do u think I can claim pregnancy as an accident so my insurance covers it?
I've decided to film a documentary centered around how he manages to keep that beast caged in such tight pants
I convinced her last night that my actual nickname was "No Condom John"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also pencil in smooth jazz and illegal activities. The usual.
He had a ladies night special at his place. Unlimited jello shots till 10, 50 cents after.
We smoked speed and opium for the first time. ended up harvesting cucumbers with locals at 9am in a farmers field. Laos is fuckin crazy.
Good news. I heard back from the doctor and I don't have a liver problem.
...yet.
You better keep a close eye on your uterus tonight cause I am looking good.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ahh, 151. Think of it this way: it took one shot to get you buzzed, I took eight. I may or may not have broken a tv with my skull that night and met someone's parents naked and hungover the next morning.
he looked at me and said 'happiness is a warm blanket' then stole my vodka.
WHY HAVE SO MANY THING GONE IN MY BUTT ON THIS TRIP
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
Let's not share with anyone else in the apartment of how we simultaneously peed in the kitchen sink last night.....
I just want you to know that i deffinately saw the baby clothes, and didn't freak out and still had sex with him. I'm going to hell.
Randomize