So drunk its hurt
If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
Is it wrong to want to cut a hole in the Tigger suit so I can molest you while I wear it?
I was totally willing to let her keep giving me blowjobs as long as she didn't think we were in a relationship.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the first call I got in the morning was from visa fraud prevention so yeah it was one of those nights
He offered me a 30 pack if I don't bring her to the party. Am I a bad friend If I take his offer?
i'm calling it girls night to make myself feel better but lets be real.....i wasn't going to get any guys tonight regardless
After your mom took her 12th and fatal tequila shot she proceeded to fall head first into the bonfire... Guess I don't have to fear getting old after all
I hope you dream of an avalanche of penises
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He just walked in the house and decided to wake everyone up by yelling "I SHIT MYSELF!" We all thought he was joking....we were all wrong.
Are there edibles for sale in the Denver airport because if so bring those to my mouth
Your favorite boobs are sending you seasons greetings
Nah, we’re just sitting around talking about different kinds of boners
You know that tattoo place next to Dallas? The naked sexy frog on my neck is proof that their "won't tattoo if drunk" sign is bullshit!
Nothing quite like spending your evening singing Shania Twain I Feel Like a Woman barbershop quartet Style with some homeless guys outside of Keyport liquor. love Shania Twain. How's your Sunday?
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