Remind me that when I'm pregnant, I should NOT post vaginal dilation updates on my facebook. Ever.
She transformed our coors light pitcher we stole from the bar into a fruit basket...
So I went outside my house this morning and basically my entire front lawn is covered in gummi bears... I think that involves you guys.
Just thought i should tell someone im on the roof, if i pass out up here because no one found me, im behind the chimney
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Couldn't get it up. She asked me what she was doing wrong. Didn't have the heart to tell her. I appreciated her willingness to adapt, but she's pretty much gonna look that bad her whole life.
pretty sure that drunk girl we saw climbing the stairs is now DJing this club....
I look like a zombie and smell like a stripper. Its gonna be a good day.
I'm mumbling to people and trying not to accidentally shit my pants
But seriously who drew a dick on a tortilla and nailed it to the door?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Are you vicariously golddigging through me?!
This makes me appreciate being single with no prospects.
They were so sore! Either I have bed bugs or you were biting my nipples last night and don't lie to me.
you bet i'm gonna rock his four-foot-two world.
I'm eating chocolate cake while this guy snaps me from the gym. Like I cant believe i actually considered getting rid of this cake. Have fun sweating ima eat this cake 👌
Wait, I'm confused. I EMPTIED the bottle? as in consumed it? I'm impressed with myself.
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