He had a number 3 tattooed on his penis. And when I asked what it meant, he said " you know like dale earnhardt, the intimidator".
Lady with a stroller in a bar. Think she's out of my league?
you should probably quit with the whole "no homo" thing, especially when you are drunk, "mo homo"gives the wrong impression.
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Your remote is drenched in lotion and you expect me to believe you weren't masturbating?!
she gave me one of those friendship bracelets and said as long as I wore it it was like an all-access pass to her vagina
I came so hard that my back seriously popped like 5 times.
I don't even know what beauty is right now. I wouldn't even pity fuck me today.
the last call horn was blaring when I tried peeling you off the bathroom floor than you uttered "Ill take the toothless one.'
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He brought me breakfast in bed after our one night stand. Beer and Cheerios I may come back to this place
I deserve to be covered in dicks
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
I told him he looked like my uncle.
Why would you say that in a bathtub?
there's a giant awkward home-wrecking elephant in the room. and its name is meg.
Now I know Sunday Funday means fucking till you loose your voice.
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