My only options right now are Herpes, Gay, or Vanilla.
the only good thing about these hospital visits are the free pregnancy tests
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
she told me if people cross their eyes and look at her, they say she looks like megan fox
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No, "because my penis told me to" is not an acceptable answer to that question
Im just a social blackout drinker.
I woke up naked dangling by my feet from the balcony over his foyer. He's officially my new favorite booty call.
This was baby jesus's way of getting you to wait until the next bikini wax
Bro. Some kids just drive-by judged the shit outta me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Super awkward when the coworker you made out with in exchange for molly last weekend keeps coming over to your cube and trying to talk to you
Do you know how hard it is to give a bj in your dead grandmothers car
THERES A FUCKBOY IN MY PERSONAL SPACE
GET IT AWAY FROM ME IM ALLERGIC
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.
I found a loose wire in my thermostat. Couldn't find the pliers, so I used a nipple clamp to fix it.
you started putting peanut butter on your pubes.
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