we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
shouldn't i get a discount if shes pregnant?
i wish i could swallow nair and shit it out and it would get rid of all my ass hair.
You were peeing on yourself thinking it was the sprinkler in your yard
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's a line of coke at 10 a.m. kind of Saturday. Don't be a pussy about life.
Fine. Just this once and because its veterans day will I send you a picture of my tits. You're lucky I love this country.
he picked an earring up off the bar floor and tried to give it to girls as a present.
I don't think it's considwred fine dining when you're passing out at golden palace in chinatown at 4 am with you boss who happens to be wearing a dress.
Your little brother is asking me for an "expert opinion" on his dick size.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
.......The other day I peed on him in the shower....he was trying to touch my boobs and I wanted my space.
i think i just encouraged him to glue googly eyes to my boobs
Flatmate got laid for the first time in 3 years. I'm baking a cake.
Does she know she is talking to people who slam shots of fireball and chase it with vodka?
You know that tattoo place next to Dallas? The naked sexy frog on my neck is proof that their "won't tattoo if drunk" sign is bullshit!
Granted, I did not plan to spend ANY hour of the last day of 2020 sober.
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