Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
69 is so not fun when his penis is sporting a 70s hairstyle
True story: Just left my solo cup on a cop car. Yesss
I woke up hungover and opened my laptop to find that i had googled alcoholism again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I looked at him all bewildered and he said, "what? I figured if it was under 30 seconds it'd be free."
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
I asked the subway guy how many cookies he thought I could smuggle into the bar. He said it looked like a 6 packer. he was correct
She had YOLO tattooed on her ass. Like, one cheek said YO, the other said LO. Even I can't handle that level of hot mess.
Highlight of my night: you taking that shot of garlic butter and then throwing the empty container down on the stairs and saying FUCK.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just googled "can they trace a vibrator back to you" so that' s how my life it going.
I wanna get high and watch Shrek tonight...don't make me do it alone.
Sooooooo Your wife and your girlfriend are making cat noises at one another via text
I am eating a fluff-a-nutter sandwich at the gym right now. I brought vodka too.
I just ate part of my sock, this has got to stop.
My penis is lonely
So is my ring finger
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