that was after robitussin, alcohol, and chocolate sauce... but before we finished pregaming
Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
Best text conversation ever. Other than the one we had about using blood for lube.
I discovered the grieving process is shock, denial, anger...and then something about drinking until you puke on yourself
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh this totally just became legit. My "boss" is puking outside my car right now. I win again.
He is in the front yard trying to catch birds out of the air with a fishing net.
Nope, just sitting on the couch, eating an advent calendar, being depressed about the herps.
We have a drunken confused pantless man in our apt. Boots.
come over after work tomorrow, liz and i will make all of your wildest dreams come true. so long as your wildest dreams involve drinking champagne at my house with two girls who won't have sex with you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just saw a girl duct tape a cigarette back together..I feel like my life is shambles for being present for this
Well I can cross being naked in a minivan off the list
Red Alert: She has 3 cats, a parrot, and 2 rats. Initiate Protocol Zero and rendezvous at Checkpoint Bravo for debriefing
I feel like I should be having more sex dreams of my boyfriend than his sister..
I hooked up with the sexiest couple in the LAX BATHROOM IN THE CHANGING FAMILY ROOM HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA
I brought my porn computer to class by accident
How much porn do you watch if you need a special computer?
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