dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
You planned my entire going away party sitting in the bath tub cradling a bottle of Cuervo. You promised me fire jugglers. And a pinata.
New term. "Find a husband" fridays. It's like thirsty thursdays, but with a dowry.
He gets a blow job and all I get is a huge scar on my arm ... how is this fair?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wine floats aren't as good of an idea as they seem
I ended up with a gash in my head from drunken dancing last night. I love life.
is it sad that i can honestly say it was the best birthday sex i've ever had and it was still terrible?
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
When one of my seniors asked "Rough night?" I realized my poor decisions involving Tuesday night drinking did not go unnoticed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Mike's my new hero. There's a flagpole of hook-up's bras on his porch and a week's supply of beer in his fridge but he still has a great job.
Like the fear of satan was put into my heart when I saw him put that sandwich on the WOODEN BENCH
I was 40 minutes late to work today because I was getting fucked. Walked in to discover that it's apparently performance review day. Employee of the year.
That was fun and all, but let's never have sex on a ladder ever again.
Am I the only person in the world that does not give a shit about the avengers?
If you have been drunk at one point during the day and are going to bed sober that same day, something is very wrong.
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