the new term for farting is butt boxing.
i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
She had to put it in. I told her I was too drunk and didnt trust myself to not put it in her ass.
Vaginas are confusing as hell with all their secret compartments and shit.
I'll get my vaginal cartography poster.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Walk-of-shaming home from Brooklyn in a Jesus costume that has "what wouldn't Jesus do" written on the robe.
I thanked her dad for "firing off a good one" when she was conceived. She said thats why he doesnt like me.
Yeah I mean its Vermont, not like id be the first guy to trade pharmaceutical services for beer
We thought we were getting kicked out but then he started tickling the bouncer. Next thing you know the bouncers giving him a piggy back ride to the bar.
it looks like my getting laid tonight is going to depend on my knowledge of native birds. this is a weird party
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The two girls sitting next to me are asking siri "Like, uh, how do you know my name?". Do I fuck with them or fuck them?
I fucked my cousin and caught chlamydia this year. I can't really harbour any illusions about myself anymore.
NO SHITSVILLE I just saw a homeless dude punch a pigeon that flew by him
No, Ethan, handcuffs and friendship bracelets are not "basically" the same thing.
I feel like everything in my life has been preparing me for my future sex robot experience
You’re so close!!!
We won like $80 last night at the casino, so if we get the Plan B we still have enough to get your basic bitch latte from Dunkin. Calm down.
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