the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
Tostitos scoops are the best shotglasses ever. Eat it after as a chaser.
Would you like me to write a persuasive essay on how you should let me suck your dick?
By the way when you were super fucked up last night, you ate cat food and tried to tell me it was healthy for you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
THIS ISN'T WORKING THIS IS THE DRUNK LEADING THE DRUNK
the most romantic thing he could do for me right now would be to throw himself into traffic
According to you, you were with your "Eskimo bro for life" last night.
Please don't judge me for my hormonal purchase, judge me for my awesome rack.
Something like that. Healthy diet of beer, ranch sunflower seeds and sex keeps me young.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My fridge door just caught on fire somehow.
You gave me a bottle of tequila and introduced me to a ginger named cowboy. I actually love you.
I hate men. But I love dick. You see my problem?
I have a hickey in my new work ID photo.....
I'm still drunk dear. I just woke up 3 feet from the front door with 20 dollars worth of taco bell in my hands.
Not going to lie, when I looked in the tub I expected to see what might have been remnants of a squirrel.
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