Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
you have to be so drunk to ignore a taser
I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.
He dropped me off at 4 in the morning because I made fun of Pearl Jam..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When hitting a Woodchuck bottle with a machete, glass will fly back and cut your face.
I hope you did not try this.
I don't think it's considwred fine dining when you're passing out at golden palace in chinatown at 4 am with you boss who happens to be wearing a dress.
When I got up in the middle of the night, puked in his trash can, and snuck out the front door, I pretty sure he knew it was over.
He just tagged everyone he's slept with this year in a 'memories of 2011' tweet
he had me stop mid-blow job to make me use my phone to id a song on the radio..
i wasnt really sure how to responde to that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In other news, someone I've had sex with won jeopardy last night.
I need a Jamo leash. Just tie it to my wrist and every time you see me reaching for a shot of it, just yank my hand away
I smelled him yesterday and almost relapsed he's like cocaine
In honor of Super Tuesday, we should have the sex tonight.
Listening to The Little Mermaid soundtrack should cure my drunkeness right?
Going to give your dick a friendship bracelet.
Randomize