You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
It's not true, it's not true! She's too full of cheese to have sexy time!
Well the light went out so I was throwing up by candle light. Strange moment in my life.
There is a bruise on my cock the size of a golfball. Bad sign.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's official, I've know hooked up with everyone I carpooled with in middle school
He literally just walked in some random persons house and walked right to they're pantry. Then five minutes later he walks out with pop-tarts, mac and cheese, and captain morgan. We need to chill with this kid more often.
You better drive. If I decide to let them talk me into a 3-way, I don't want you to be stranded.
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
Holy Hangover.. I'm marrying whoever put this water by my bed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We were having margaritas and I was saying "back when I was drinking..." They looked all confused. Then I realized "holy shit they think THIS is drinking?"
Oh, I also stabbed a guy Friday and he still asked me out
OMG WE ARE UP TO THREE MINORS WORKING HERE. I AM NOT READY FOR THIS MID LIFE CRISIS.
I’m honestly just flattered that you think I could make PornHub’s Top 10.
When I woke up I was spooning with a block of cheese. Like, cuddling. Me and the cheese we nestling...
My husband found the cock ring I bought my FWB. I told him it was napkin holder and he believed me. And that’s why I need a side dick
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