Yea, forget your mom. She will be home after her one night stand.
I totally thought the tree was playing the guitar
Woke up to a denim duvet cover this morning... why r guys so tacky?
airport. 106 proof japanese liquor. 4 little travel size containers. im proud to be smarter than the average american.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
Take your time, they're doing body shots off the dog.
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
we took shots then she made me eat a dill pickle with cream cheese wrapped in a piece of turkey.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So hungover. I'm getting too old for trolloping around in disco shorts going shot for shot with well behaved underclassmen in an effort to lure them to the dark side of alcoholism and liver failure.
We had sex in the morning in pregnant lady position. Like fuck me like the hott piece of ass that I am, not your wife of 7 years.
I mean, he's 40, foreign, artsy but with substance abuse problems and estranged children. How is he not my type?
Goodnight Shia. Goodnight Moon.
True strength comes from lack of pants
I'm not having sex with him if he doesn't believe in gay marriage and abortions.
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