Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
i'm touring the leper colony via mapquest street view so we dont have to go there
so stoned i ashed in my jack and coke like 4 times. drinking it anyway
His dick was so small it sat perched on top of his balls like it was king of his scrotum.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When I came home you were watching infomercials, eating croutons out of the box and salsa from a funnel. Well done.
i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
he threw up all over himself while laying down.. it was like watching old faithful, but with noodles and vodka
i told you that I felt like my feet were melting into the ground and you starting blowing on them to put out the "invisible fire". thanks friend.
If you happen to tell anybody my drunk story in the near future, please refrain from telling them about me shitting myself. People are getting the wrong idea and random people are messaging me on Facebook making fun of me for that
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pounding your chest saying "me Tarzan" is not flirting or even talking
the new numbers in my phone would beg to differ
I spent the money she owed me on enough magnum condoms to make a blimp. Damn right I'm going to make the best of it.
I'm bored enough im considering taking up his offer to turn me straight just to kill time until the lasagna is out of the oven
I WOLD FCUK YUO INTOO THE MOON
THE MOOOOOOOON
alright well Taco Bell Closes at 12 so you better pray to god she's asleep by then or I'm running in your house butt ass naked with a bag of tacos
I'm so baked, I spent the last hour trying to screencapture the cracks on my phone.
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