I woke up fully clothed on top of my sheets and i didnt even pee myself..so proud.
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
just woke up COVERED in glow sticks and glitter. didn't even have to turn the light on to puke.
I'm questioning the dried chocolate syrup on my tits.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I know is that we apparently made a drink we named The Single Girl which is rum, vodka, grain alcohol, and sprite and rolled around in the backyard.
and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp
Taking shot for every red box on your worst bracket. I have 30. I might die tonight.
There's a knife in my toilet. And I meant to ask you last night if you got a hair cut?
Learned a valuable life lesson last night. It's titled "Tequila: Still A Bad Idea".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Would you wanna look up as you cum and for a split-second see your dad?
I just very easily got pretty high off of one bowl of shitty dirt weed. I'm a sad excuse for who I used to be.
The only image of you you know is from reflections or pictures. Its 2d. But what other people see is 3d. How do you know that's your real face! MIND.BLOWN.
They said you bought the guy a shot and was talking about being Greek and then all of the sudden just puked all in their pitcher of beer and got kicked out of the bar.
Frankly, since I met you, I practically exist in a state of constant readiness for sex
I booty texted him nothing but three exclamation points at 3:05am and he was in my bed 17 minutes later, lest you think punctuation is not important.
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