"you've got the devil in yuh. the curse of Jesus is coming on your sex soon." That's what a homeless guy just told me.
Motorboating on a tuesday night. not too shabby....
i guess you could say your face is two degrees of separation from my balls
the date was going great.. until he pulled down his pants and asked if there was any hair in between his cheeks.
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i wish i had the videos of us pissing on him last night.
The only way i can get arrested is public drunkenness or defacing a national monument. Trust me, i have already looked it up.
Seriously, webMD this shit for me, I cant move and I dont wanna die until I have something worth fighting over in my will
We got out of the car in valet drinking beers we gave the valet one as a tip
50% drunk capacity currently
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants
Stocking up on Wasabi powder. Nobody's tampons are safe.
this new dose of ADD meds is totally being waisted with the unemployed new graduate thing if only I could add my hyper focused side effects to a coverletter
I just want a relatively mentally stable guy with tattoos and facial hair that loves Captain America as much as I do and will fuck me the way I deserve to be fucked, is that too much to ask for?
Give me one good reason why I should go with you.
Free beer.
..pick me up at 8.
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