YEA!!! I'll throw you a non-baby shower.
That's the secret to virgins: blizzards.
hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
She was running around the bar, demanding everyone call her Jesus or else she would attack them like a llama. ack.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just egged your windshield and it froze on contact. Have fun with that.
if you think for one second that i'm not using my mittens as hand puppets at the bar tonight then u dont know me at all!
we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
be ready to rage tomorrow. like naked ranch dressing rage
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just don't do feelings in the summer months.
Oh shit. My drunken car sex is on Google Earth.
did you know gatorade and rum go really good together
Are you doing depressed science again
maybe
I was shitfaced. I filled my contact case WITH TANNING LOTION
I love you man but my hope is that you will not wake me up again by pissing on me
Your mom has reinvented the use of a ping pong ball.
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