My little brother has some high school girls in my pool, it's like a jailbait buffet in my backyard
Most awkward thing ever: Meeting your BattleShits opponent post war.
the fair has chocolate covered bacon...impossible is nothing.
Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm drinking away my Christmas cash. People are going to get bar receipts as presents.
okay so using the row boat as a giant snow sled probably wasn't the best idea.
Just desperately used the "it's a boy" cigar I saved from my\nnephews birth to roll a blunt
My vagina is depressed thinking about her future.
Brandon's Recipe: two parts cocoa, one part sugar, one part milk, two parts four, 378 parts paranoia. Thanks for the fucking brownies, bitch.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know you're too drunk when you start calling people out for unfollowing you on social networks.
The struggles of a small town man whore
He just showed up in boxer briefs and loafers with only his phone and condoms
Jesus fuck. I just hit on him in front of the whole fire department. They hit the sirens and told us to get a room. FML. I can never go back to that fire station again...
So I decided to sleep with him for the first time in months so I can convince him it's his kid instead of the other guy
what did we do after we left your crib?
you layed down in some rocks for about an hour, you stole some pumpkins, you passed out and started shaking, we got t-bell, we took you back to the dorm.
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