I printed and framed a picture of a seagull shitting, and hung it in my house. I'm waiting to see how long it takes everyone to notice.
If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
the vast amounts of cleavage i'm sporting to my final says "no, I didn't study but don't worry I've got something lined up for when I don't graduate".
can you go into shock from having too many orgasms? i think i went into shock.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just dropped off shoes at Mike's hotel. The chick he hooked up with last night stole his phone and shoes.
His apology was sex and a subway sandwich. Strangely, I'm okay with that.
My brother just asked if I would keep having one nighters with that guy because he really likes the organic cotton v-necks he leaves behind.
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
You looked at my sister and yelled at her saying in a couple of years she will be yours
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So a guy died and our dates revived him with CPR. Good night?
I just got home and someone ate all my chicken nuggets. Bitches be asking for a death sentence?
Let us bow our heads and pray that I don't throw up in the tub
I feel like I just did it with Buster from Arrested Development. Taking a shower. #winefail
I would like to make it known to all of you that my penis is official retired, but it thanks you for the countless years of service you provided
I really need to stop having sex.. I haven't been able to get a brush through the back of my hair for a good week and a half
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