I dont shave on purpose to keep myself from being slutastic!! it usually works
i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
dude i just saw a topless girl trying to get into her locked car. im moving here
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When they saw it was the 7th inning of the baseball game one took off running for the beer stand while his friend is yelling "BUY THE KEG"!
We stole a cat. That is all you need to know.
I just debated creating a mirror system so I could play Batman while in the bathroom. I think I need help.
I already knew that. But I also don't agree with stifling creativity.
You made out with my dog and told me he tasted like a rainbow.
Correction... Drunk on winter break. There are no days of the week on break.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you enjoy dance recitals as much as I do, that's one shitty Father's Day...
I mean, the night I fell out of that bus I made you pour vodka onto my wound to clean it, then duct taped a paper towel to my hand and kept drinking.
I just ordered $70 worth of pizza and I'm not even ashamed. Happy Valentine's Day to me.
If he would've shaved his beard when we first broke up, getting over him would've been so much simpler. That asshole.
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
i can feel my liver failing just LOOKING at that thing
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