Houston.. we have a drinking problem..
Oh shit. I just had to lure him into the bedroom so I could take the list of his negative qualities off the fridge so he wouldn't see.
just saw a guy try to order booze in his coffee at 8 am.
No one showed up yet so I smoked 4:20 on chatroulette with a naked chick..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
I just had to stop two people giving each other hand jobs in the pool. That was not something I was taught in lifeguard training
Shit. We're going to have to drink until they're cute
Hello cirrhosis
The best, and by the best I mean the worst, was the 7 month along pregnant chick in the skin tight body suit.
Since I fall down so much at parties I've started doing this new thing where when I fall I just yell FLOOR PARTY and make people bring the party to me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
HE TRIED TO HIT ME WITH A CHAIR. Stoned video games are NOT happening again
I find it ironic...the gays are dying to get married & I just want a fucking divorce
He is always putting motivational shit on FB. So its like i know hes sad lonely and looking at internet porn. Break up winning
i pushed adam in a shopping cart for 15 blocks, then we realized we left tyler downtown
did you go back and get him?
nah we went to a karaoke bar instead, so worth it
All I can remember from last night was eating nutella and touching myself to Weird Science.
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
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