He asked to "fluff my boner.."
she just announced that once she was paid to deep throat a light saber with a mint flavored condom on it. i'm speechless.
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
I gave him head and we watched Fashion Police. somehow it wasn't awkard.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My roommate was being an ass so I put everyone's drinks/shots on his tab for the entire night. Then when we left he was telling me how he got out cheaper than last time.
Figured out how I got so much alcohol in my hair: tried to drink my drink using my cleavage as a cup holder. Missed my drink hole and got it all in my hair
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
I just set a reminder on my phone to get star spangled hammered this weekend.
So, it's been almost 3 months and and I still dont know her last name. That's gotta be a record.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it weird to wish your favorite hooker "happy thanksgiving"?
The guys who program Autocorrect have never seen a vagina in person
She's seen your dick through your pants. You don't need to ask
UPDATE: THERE IS ASS EATING. I REPEAT: THERE IS ASS EATING.
Dude. Craziest ride ever. I was convinced that the bus was an airplane. There were clouds when I looked out the window. I got really upset every time the bus turned because airplanes shouldn't turn.
Lmao. K I'll be 100% honest. I was over at your place like 12 hours ago with your roommate. If I hadn't of been there then I'd take you up on your booty call offer. So. If you're not creeped out another time please?
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