afterwards we were spooning and he said he wished he was a kangaroo so he cold put me in his pouch and keep me forever. I left as soon as he was asleep.
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
She was mid-sentence and then BOOM the hammock broke off the tree. I about pissed myself. Hot Sprite and Vodka make the world go round.
I feel like fucking him is something we all do but don't want to admit to. like masturbating or peeing in the shower
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You can do it. What doesn't kill us just drives us to drink
Well there is another shower in Nov. So I have three months to figure out how to get some drunk space fucking. May need some of your mead
Just realized I could have five different dicks in me the day of valentines day but no real date. My life
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
I am no longer drunk enough to crave tostitos
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Last night I got drunk on margaritas at an Irish pub and came home with only one shoe. I have to get my shit together.
You really know how to show Monday who's boss.
So, in keeping with the last two years, are we going to watch the new Hobbit movie on acid again? It's kinda starting to feel like a Christmas tradition.
We had everything under control until this one jackass fucked up. Thanks, Peter.
Totally writing my paper on the toilet. Makes me miss you.
I feel like everything in my life has been preparing me for my future sex robot experience
You’re so close!!!
I may have passed out and puked all over the host's favorite couch, but three hours and a rip later, I was eating tiramisu in the bathtub with the birthday boy and a hot Italian.
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