So when does "going out for one drink" = giving some guy an HJ on the sidewalk?!?
his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
Two portable blenders. We are going to be popular and dangerous.
side note. good thing you didn't come to drunk breakfast. we were judged by children.
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Just saw all the pictures from the party. I'm wearing a different shirt in every single one.
Are you sighing at your phone and judging me right now?
door buzzer is fixed. took shots with Latvian electrician to celebrate. nice guy. he is gonna bring mixers next time cuz kombucha didn't really cut it for him.
He keeps texting me videos of fish swimming in his fish tank, so I think it's safe to say he's back on weed.
Currently siting in the living room naked, staring at one of the girls across the street in her living room naked. This is like the most intense starting contest of all time.
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you stuck pieces of bread to your face with peanut butter and asked if it looked like you had a facial yeast infection.
ohhhh that's why they asked me to leave...
That guy was drunk and couldn't get it up so he just tried to scissor me.
i woke up with a shamrock tattoo on my wrist and a fat bruise on my hipbone. please tell me its not real.
He dicked me, fed me creme brulee, and didn’t make a big deal out of me causing a flood to come outta my vagina
Marry him NOW
Boredom is so much more tolerable when you're stoned off your ass.
You fucked him, didn’t you?
He showed up at my house with tacos, rum and a negative Covid test. Of course I fucked him. I’m just a simple girl that likes tacos, not Margaret Thatcher!
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