he just said he'd buy the porn
its a step up from the last guy
so I was thinking like, Rob Pattinson could make so much money whoring himself out dressed as Edward Cullen.
yeah, I mean if he's down to fuck a lot of fat chicks and stare at Tiger Beat posters of himself above the bed...
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
I want to apologize 3 days in advance for what's about to take place on St. Patrick's day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Her brother was practicing the clarinet....it was like having sex in a starbucks
I like the one of me you and her but you're looking at me...Total foreshadowing right there. I'm cropping it
My dealer's mom died on christmas eve. Is it too soon to see if he's holding?
So many people have lost their virginity on my futon... I think it is only the right thing to bronze it and put it on display
You turned byob into bring your own shit show. Good work.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just bartered a McD's cheeseburger and fries for two pitchers. Oregon Trail ain't got shit on me.
I'm pretty sure the girl in the stall next to me is waiting on me to leave so she can poop but I'm doing the same thing so it's like a Mexican standoff
Every person I've ever had sex with is in Chipotle right now.
You just sat there staring at your apple and saying "I'm so glad you're here" to it every time you took a bite.
I didn't even get crazy off of the coke so everything's fine. Also, I think I might have killed my aunt's dog..
I love you.
Bad choice
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