I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
The nice sales man at 711 gave me a handful of free lighters for buying a carton of cigarettes. I guess the depressed damsel in distress look works for me.
She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
Just saying. If you end up in canada tomorrow morning at least youll have my text to remind you how it happened
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wish his dick was as long as his hair.
Through drunken recall, I have managed to bring back awful memories of losing my virginity. And possibly traumatized my niece trying to get her to "learn from my mistakes".
I know. You don't know poor life choice until your sitting on the floor of a community bathroom waiting to vomit at 4 am
Have your arms or hands ever gone numb after drinking too much?
Wtf did you do last night?
Between my vag yelling at me for having bad sex and my legs yelling at me for going to the gym I cant hear myself think.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just gave my liver a good luck and I'm sorry speech
Why are there two phone calls to calgary police in my phone and why is there a voicemail from you asking for bail money
I swear to god those aren't related
I'm not in the business of asking people about their lizard
I meant his actual lizard not his manhood
You took nana to a bar?!
she suggested it
Also, we can't be seen together looking suspicious or sexually satisfied
Got caught up in a real life love triangle. Both guys wanted me. I'm tempted to just run off with the cute girl from McDonalds instead
Please do that
Randomize