yeah but it's new years. they should arrest people for being sober that day.
i don't know what the guinness world record is for longest time eating nothing but skittles but i'm going on six days
My hand is eating my burrito and not saving any for my mouth. TRIPPPPPPPPPPPPPPINN!
i think you're the only person in the world who masturbates to food network.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Since when do you have sex with people you have feelings for?
Dude you don't understand. I genuinely felt his soul's penis in my soul's vagina.
I bought everclear. Bring your party pants and some addies
You're not gonna punch me in the face again are you?
Even when you're down just know that I will always be the one to pour alcohol into your asshole when you're on probation
Just had a guy try to pull the maraca out of my shirt with his teeth... Wtf
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
him and the cab driver we buy e from got into a fist fight, about which show is better, futurama or family guy.
she paid $15 and a box of cheerios for their acid
LEAVE ME AND MY NIPPLES ALONE
I just took a plan B pill with my preworkout. That's the level I'm on today.
I'm sorry, but if I hear stories of you getting fingered in the ass, and selling weed, you are not coming to my party.
I pointed at him and said “there goes mr fuckwad”
Randomize