there's a guy here who looks like a hipster got a hold of obama and gave him a makeover.
Facebook is used to stalk your friends, Twitter is used to stalk celebritie=s, and Myspace is used to stalk underaged girls. Everything else is porn. T=he Internet in a nutshell.
I need to remember that good judgment goes out the window after the 7th shot and the 3rd Lady GaGa song.
she was passed out on the moving sidewalks in the airport, we NEED to travel more often
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It took 5 minutes to find my bra.. in his car.
The other night after we fucked we talked about Lowe's vision insurance. Never fuck a coworker.
At least I tried to be smart when I brought the alarm clock into the bathroom just in case I fell asleep.
Like. I probably should fuck him. I owe him for breaking his thumb.
Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've never felt so epic in my entire life as I do right now, my bare testicles staring down the ocean itself
Seriously! We need to take her a thank you note or something. She puts up with the drugs and the extremely loud sex. She deserves a thank you card.
I WOKE UP IN A FUCKING DOG BED HOW DO YOU THINK I FEEL
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
Well the grass always *looks* greener on the other side but sometimes that’s bc there’s a sewage runoff...
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