oh ps. last night you kept telling me to calm down because everything was fine cause you were getting "arab money"...
I don't remember much but I know I looked hot.
if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
You can identity the picture as me the mistress his wife and him. It's that kinda awkard.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just tried to text you by typing "whoa" into my contacts.
Turns out I was the only one drinking. I broke one guy's bed and kicked another in the face. Then when an RA came by I shouted to let him in he's gonna find the vodka anyway. Great night
I LOVE DRINKING BOOZE OUT OF A FUCKING LAMP
Thought it only fitting this Jubilee weekend to snort lines with a 50 note
Your patriotism amazes me, the Queen would be proud!
Please tell me joes at work safe and sound and doesn't smell like jail?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
James this is colleen. This is my new number. You just texted my grandma about getting cockblocked. Congratulations.
I just had to call my mom to come pick me up stoned at a Lana's house and beg her to buy me Taco Bell. I'm graduating from college in 14 hours. Fuck
we're all going for beer and wings at 7. inflate your girlfriend and bring her along too.
My dog is now used to me drunk singing and sleeps through it. I don't know how I feel about this
I don't think I've ever met a guy with a bush bad enough that I would choose a cactus over it.
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
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