Your tits are I can't wait for
Dont touch anything! You just got rid of your crabs!
I just fell asleep with a sandwich in my mouth at Cosi..people definitely saw
its raining. im dressed as yoda and im trick or treating alone. and i wonder why im still a virgin..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
Besides the flaccid incident, it was decent. Average sized. So this is my life now. Loneliness and lackluster sex.
I gave up on alcohol forever for like 2 hours, that's got to be a new record
Sorry if this is weird, but please don't have sex in my truck. I get to be the first...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
I just used a coke ridden $20 bill to buy Girl Scout cookies
I am sweating Crown. It all went wrong when the ratio hit 50-50
I just put on the jeans I was wearing last night and pulled 4 baby carrots out of my back pocket....
He has me blocked on facebook.... so I stalked him using my cats fan page.
I just bought a bottle of dried bees on Etsy. I am the wrong person to talk you out of this.
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