is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
Haha so you are never gonna want to meet my mom now...she just found your thong in her front seat
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
I'm not 100% sure, but I think someone gave me a bath last night...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you were saying "i am the vodka queen!" and then in a different voice replying to yourself "all hail the vodka queen! you are so beautiful!"
Everyone makes mistakes, yours just means you will forever be known as the chick that tried to steal a cheese plate from the funeral.
He appeared on my 7th floor fire escape and sang to me and jimmy through the window when we fucked. He's like a drunken mix of Sinatra and Spiderman.
Doing shrooms is fine until you get raped by curtains
Only catch is you have to sleep in the same bed as me. But no worries, I plan on being in a random guys hotel room every night. So it's essentially yours.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I went down on her for 35 minutes and didn't even get a handy. I've never felt more desire to be gay in my life.
Dude. She came to my room in nothing but a trench coat. Took it off and said, "you like" in her Costa Rican accent. God I love college.
The dick pic bandit just sent me a poem about showering..
Im just confused who has their mom break up with someone
I never knew it was coming. He was cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, and then BAM! Best hookup ever.
I'm like the kinda excited when David After Dentist stands up in his seat, screams, and collapses
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