I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
His pick-up line from last night: "I bet you cant climb these stairs right now." Needless to say.. it worked.
it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
Some guy just watched me feed 30 dimes and 3 quarters for bread and cheese at the self checkout at walmart. I no longer comprehend shame...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So the next morning, she had to tell her kids we were moving furniture around all night.
We need to get sombreros so I can give them to strippers.
There's a treasure map on your stomach. Treasure may or may not be the clothes you lost...enjoy
Believe it or not I'm actually not the only person sitting in the back of the train covered in glitter and drinking whiskey out of an arizona iced tea can. Small world.
I am the kind of drunk to where i can still drive a golf cart
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm two sheets to the sexual wind
Breakfast of champions
Is that a dick crepe?
It is indeed
He left his cock-ring in my truck.
Consider it a gay sex souvenir.
Walking around as slutty Ron Swanson is amazing
If I don't get struck by a lightning bolt from God by midnight it will be a Christmas miracle.
The first time he ever tried to hold my hand, I moon walked away.
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