Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
Dude, I had to masturbate just to stay warm. Please pay the gas bill?
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
he slipped a picture of a kangaroo under my door that said "im sorry" on the back and passed out on my lawn.. who the fuck is this kid?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He peed in the bird bath. Those birds are gonna be pissed
At least I got to make out with you a little before you proposed.
I'm honestly considering asking her if I can eat her out, as a friend.
I showed my cat the amount of coke I had. She looked concerned.
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Call it slutty but I take pride in being a first round draft pick booty call. And I know I was first cause he texted me at 1030a
Dude, putting on underwear straight out of the dryer is the greatest thing ever. It feels like I wrapped my vagina in a warm blanket.
I am so horny that I an legitimately concerned for your safety when I see you tonight.
the universe is starting to freak me out.. ive now had sex with 3 people who were born on the same day..
Remember that gum I swallowed 3 days ago? I just threw it up.... whole.
They say you need two forms of ID, but in reality 1 nice set of tits works every time
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