Why did we buy the only spinning apartment on campus?
do you remember how we all fit in that bathtub?
tequila
When are you freeeeeeeeee?
My phone auto corrected that to freeeeeeeeeedoooooooooom. That's kinda awesome.
last nights makeup is better than no makeup at all.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
I only make drug deals in a British accent. It's my way of making sure it doesn't get too sketch.
why is there a handicap sign in the bathtub and an exit sign in the kitchen?
lets deal with that after we figure out where i am
I'm terrified to sleep next to her. Of course the sex will be fuckng awesome.
sweet and enthusiastic is code for tiny dick.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I lost it last night. That was humiliating. Cincinnati is now covered in my puke.
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
Found my ex-boyfriend's money stash. Call the girls, we are getting fucked up tonight, my treat.
had a dream that i inhaled my pet bird and started choking. Then I tried smoking from a bong and suddenly I smoked myself inside out. this is what happens when I don't smoke weed. my brain can't function!
You did a body shot out of her belly button with a bendy straw.
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